There are thousands of ways to ask your fiancée to marry you, and thousands of other ways to concretize your love during your secular ceremony. I propose you a small overview of the secular ceremonies to help you to see more clearly. During my live #6 on instagram with Justine from D Day wedding planer Alpes, wedding planner and ceremony officiant, many of you have asked us questions. We answer them here too to help you during your preparations.
what are the highlights of a secular ceremony?
In a city hall ceremony, the state representative sets forth various laws regarding the rights and duties that the couple owes each other. During a secular ceremony, the issue is not legal and yet this moment is just as solemn.
Justine organizes the secular ceremonies she officiates in several stages. First of all, the spouses share certain moments or anecdotes from their childhood. Then, they share key moments of their life together, like the first time they moved in together. The witnesses then take the floor with a solemn reading. Forget about plays, revisited songs or other fantasies. Your witnesses are the people who know you best, so this is the perfect time to indulge in an emotional sequence that takes you to the heart.
Of course, after all these declarations that will make you capsize, you say yes to your partner for life. To seal this incredible moment, you carry out the ritual chosen in advance with your officiant.
WHAT IS THE ROLE OF THE OFFICIANT IN THE DESIGN OF A CEREMONY?
The bond between the bride and groom and the officiant is very strong, one would almost say fusional. During the preparatory phase of the ceremony, the bride and groom share a lot of information through an exhaustive questionnaire filled out by the bride and groom individually. Each bride and groom is free to share moments that are dear to them, details that are important to them, while feeling confident in their exchanges with the officiant.
Thanks to this questionnaire, the officiant can then write the text that will be used to animate the ceremony. The bride and groom will also be consulted to choose the five or six pieces of music that will set the pace of their wedding. Of course, the bride and groom and the officiant choose or imagine a ritual to seal their love.
Can we create rituals that meet the expectations of the bride and groom?
Of course there is a predefined list of basic rituals (cocktail, wine, sand, tea, ribbons…) but you can find other personalized proposals. For example, Justine created a beer ritual for a couple who had met in a brewery and whose beer had a special place in their social life. Drinking a pint represented a moment of sharing with friends and family, and the bride and groom wanted to share this moment with all their guests.
The ritual is still very symbolic to represent the bride and groom, their qualities, their journey, the trials they have experienced and what seals their love.
CAN RELIGIOUS ELEMENTS BE INCORPORATED INTO A CEREMONY?
It is entirely possible to integrate religious elements into the ceremony. The reading of a biblical text can be integrated instead of a ritual. It is all in the way the officiant brings the reading to give it the tone desired by the bride and groom. It is also possible to work with a religious representative to introduce a time of blessing to represent the beliefs of one of the bride and groom for example.
AND IF YOU DON'T WANT TO USE A professionnal wedding ceremony OFFICIANT ?
If you wish to ask your witnesses or a close friend to animate your laic ceremony, it is not a problem. Justine can help you with the writing of your ceremony without delivering the message on the D-day. An officiant can write the text and help you organize this special day without being present on the D-day. You will be able to make the text your own, rework it to your liking and give your wedding the precise tone you want.